The Chanting Typist: FOR BETTER OR FOR WORST

Today is my 10th Wedding Anniversary! I have to be honest and say that while I'm pretty happy to have made it this far, it hasn't been a walk in the park with songbirds, sunny days and flowers in bloom. Uh...no. It certainly didn't start out that way either. There have definitely been some ups and downs, days when we were ready to throw in the towel and call it a day. But, all in all, it's a testament to our committed relationship that our marriage has stood the test of ten long years together.

I remember the day like it was yesterday. It was going to be a romantic wedding getaway in beautiful, tropical Oahu, Hawaii. I wasn't nervous or jittery, it all felt right. As a matter of fact that afternoon we went over to the hotel bar and toasted to our upcoming nuptials which were to take place on the beach during the evening sunset. The day before, however, was a whole other scenario. On the day we arrived my then-fiancé's wallet was stolen at the restaurant where we had our dinner. He inadvertently left it on the table as we got up to leave. He turned back 30 seconds later and it was gone -- cash, credit cards and vouchers; not to mention identification (thank God we had already applied for our marriage license). There went half of our cash and the means by which we had planned to close the deal. After discussing the setbacks and consequences of what this meant, including calling off the wedding, we decided that this was not going to get in the way of what we planned to be the happiest day in our lives together. So we went for it. He ironed out all the details and smoothed out the wrinkles. We got married at sunset as planned.

I should've taken heed of what this ordeal could have possibly meant for our future -- it was definitely some kind of omen. I would be lying if I said the entire ceremony went without a hitch. Even though it was a lovely setting and a touching ceremony, little things did go wrong up until the reception dinner ended. But it was finally over, and we spent the next 3 days enjoying the rest of our trip as best we could. We've been through quite a bit since then, but like any other marriage it has been time tested. We've had homes, lost homes, had businesses, lost business, made money, lost money, made good memories, made bad memories. But when I step back to look at the big picture of what this marriage has painted, I realize that going through the tough times has made us stronger and willing to persevere in the midst of adversity. It seems easier at times to just give up, but for a couple like us who have pushed through all kinds of obstacles, that's just not in our nature.

I think we knew what we were in for, especially after that night when the wedding had been ill-fated, that this was pretty much how it was going to be from now on. But just like we made the decision 10 years ago to not let anything get in our way no matter how bad it appeared, we use that same determination to not let the bad moments get in the way of standing by one another. It would be too easy a choice to say it's over. We're not the type to give in so easily, and when we face things that appear to divide us, there is something more powerful at work keeping us together -- it's TRUST. No matter how bad things get, I can always trust that he's going to be right there by my side for better or for worse -- even if worse seems at times to prevail far more times than better. I trust that better is catching up now.